Ziggy Stardust and the Moths Outside Our House.

I'm actually starting to think that David Bowie had no idea that Ziggy Stardust would be stuck in my head for the last 2 weeks straight. Without cease.

I wish I could actually play drums. Or Country music. I wish I could write and play country. I need a folklift. A little known elective surgery where one's folk-ness and down-home appeal are augmented though the addition of a pearl-snap sutured on for 6-8 weeks. I would go into greater detail but I think I was just recently demoted to nurse from Jamie Granite M.D. Assholes.

I don't know why I'm posting anything right now I have nothing to say. I'm so bored I'll rant online. Probably better this way... Lena can't make fun of me directly. She'll post a comment making fun of me as soon as she reads it, which gives me a couple of days. Thank goodness for that.

but where WERE the spiders?

try saying shrimp shack 5 times fast. SHRIMP SHACK SHRIMP SHACK SHIRPMA SHACK SHIRPMA SHCAK SHRIPM SHACK. dammit.

ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK!


blah.

Fascists.

So, I was investigating this so called "profile" when I discovered that Blogger asks you a little question. Something capricious and carefree ideally, but the question I got most recently, was a little more serious.

It was as follows.

"Why is it the color blue always means raspberry flavored?"

And I was all like I know you didn't just ask me that. Because I am probably one of the few people who knows the truth about this whole sordid affair. So, I answered the question honestly, and I was CENSORED! max 150 characters MY ASS. THE MAN just doesn't want the truth of this mess to get out. Well well well, thanks to the unfathomable strength of my newly discovered "1-click publishing" I can now speak out against this which I have held inside me for so long.

THE TRUTH, MY FRIENDS ABOUT THE CONNECTION BETWEEN BLUE AND RASPBERRIES IS AS FOLLOWS:

It all started during Mao's Cultural Revolution. The color red became almost unanimous with Communism. Though most of the world did not know it, raspberries were a substantial part of China's GDP at that time, and accounted for nearly half of the exports coming out of China. After the cultural revolution however, few in the "West" wanted anything to do with those slanty-eyed communists and their damned color red. So, in an incredibly deft manuever of propaganda, Mao had the color of raspberries changed to blue, and laundered the origin of the raspberries in the extensive mess of international postage. That is how today, The American Public so readily eats up their Blue Razz refreshers from Stewarts, The Blue Raspberry blow pop and other such engines of communist spin. Blue is not the color of freedom friends. It is the color of deceit.

Just call me Shallow Larynx.

I Should Not Have A Blog.

I shouldn't have a blog. I don't have anything to tell people. This is merely a vehicle for me to talk to bren bren and leeeens.

I have reconsidered my previous statement.

I can have a blog. Hell, anybody can have a blog. Not only can I have a blog, since no one will ever read this I can be prolific in my self importance! I can even use words like self important. I mean prolific. Here, just to prove that I am master of my own domain...I proudly present:

A Haiku
by me

whisper on the wind
a leaf falls into a bush
my futility



thank you. thanks. thanks you.

i'm a little choked up.